Puritan Richard Sibbes, in a helpful passage from his book, The Bruised Reed, investigates the source of discouragement in a believer's life. He writes, "Where, then do these discouragements come from?
1. Not from the Father, for he has bound himself in covenant to pity us as a father pities his children (Psalm 103:13)...
2. Not from Christ, for he by office will not quench the smoking flax. We see how Christ bestows the best fruits of his love on persons who are mean in condition, weak in abilities, and offensive for infirmities... And this he does, first, because thus it pleases him to confound the pride of the flesh, which usually measures God's love by some outward excellency; and secondly in this way he delights to show the freedom of his grace and confirm his royal prerogative that 'he that glorieth' must 'glory in the Lord' (1 Corinthians 1:31)...
3. Neither do discouragements come from the Spirit. He helps our infirmities, and by office is a comforter (Romans 8:26; John 14:16). If he convinces of sin, and so humbles us, it is that he may make way for his office of comforting us.
Discouragements, then, must come from ourselves..."
I suspect the primary source of discouragement comes when our personal expectations are thwarted by the realities of life. We develop an idea of how WE think life should proceed, and it's often quite a rosy picture without the realities of pain and struggle. Inevitably our expectations don't materialize... and we become discouraged, perhaps depressed and maybe even angry at God for not delivering on our expectation. Life isn't the way we planned it...and it's painful!
For a believer, the key to moving away from a life of discouragement is to focus instead upon submission to God's hand in our lives, and to replace OUR particular expectations with His. Scripture says we do that by daily denying self and following HIM. We keep our focus on HIM, saturating ourselves in His Word, meditating on how to conform our lives to the truths found there, communicating with Him through prayer and gathering together for mutual edification/building up to do the work of the ministry. We learn to regularly examine our heart's expectations, changing them as we walk with our eyes on Him, highly sensitive to whatever situation He might bring us into that day. We rest in His comfort, His purposes, His timing... His sovereignty.
"Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:18-18
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